1. Snow job

    College Republican chapters across the country have begun hosting “Global Cooling Day” events to debunk the myths deny the facts about global warming. There are kiddie pools, sand, girls in bikinis, even free snow cones. Ah, rich white kids — never funnier than when they’re mocking the disease and death awaiting the global poor. Wocka wocka!

    Photo courtesy of College Republican National Committee.

  2. Imagine all the people playing to stereotype

    Meanwhile, some 3,000 earnest activists gathered on a beach in Australia to raise awareness about global warming by having a beach party prancing around in bikinis giving out free snow cones spelling out the word “Imagine.” Seriously. Why do we keep letting the evil people have so much more fun?

    Photo: Ben Marsden.

  3. L.A. flaw

    Meanwhile, still more earnest activists descended on the 14-acre South Central Community Farm to protest its imminent demolition. Folk singer Joan Baez (yes, still alive) and one-trick-pony Julia Butterfly Hill are, as you’ve probably guessed, not wearing bikinis or serving snow cones. Instead, they’re sitting in a tree. In other news, it’s 2006.

    Photo: Jesse Grant / WireImage.com

  4. Italian nice

    Perhaps earnest activists refuse to wear bikinis (and yes, yes, we think boys should wear low-slung boardshorts) because they’re worried about the impact on landfills. Happily, Italian designers have conjured up a bikini made from recycled polymer that is 100 percent biodegradable. No excuses left, people!

    Photo: Minaboutique.

  5. After a little green, anyone would need a map

    In non-bikini news, Google Maps has teamed up with the Earth Day Network to create “Have a green summer,” a site that allows you to find every grubby hostel, jam-band festival, and bongwater-soaked college dorm room in a given area, so you can get the green. Or maybe we misunderstood.