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Sarah Miller's Posts

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China is building buses so enormous that cars can just drive underneath them

See it's simple the cars go UNDER the bus.

You know when you're driving and there's a bus in front of you and it's annoying as hell, partly because buses are annoying, and mostly because we are impatient assholes? Well, the Chinese are developing a solution for this problem: super tall buses you can drive under.

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Newly discovered species of spider is as big as your face

How interesting. Now please stay away from me.
How interesting. Now please stay away from me.

Have you ever been to Northern Sri Lanka? Well, if you haven't, don't go now, because they have just discovered a new type of tarantula there and the thing is fucking huge. Put it this way: If you put the thing on your face, and looked at yourself in the mirror, all you would see is spider body, spider legs, and one terrified human eye.

Read more: Living

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We really want to live in this floating Finnish village — and thanks to climate change, we’ll eventually have to

sito
Marina Housing

Finland's first floating village is under construction in Pori, a small city on the country's west coast. The floating villas are very cool looking, have energy-saving technologies, and were designed to handle the occasionally extreme local weather. Sixteen such houses will be built when the project is complete. After Grist List moves into three of them, that leaves 13 for the rest of you.

Read more: Cities, Living

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Kidnapped Ethiopian girl rescued by caring, protective lions

Dramatic reenactment.
Dramatic reenactment.

A 12-year-old girl kidnapped by a group of seven men in the Ethiopian city of Bita Genet was found several days after her abduction, safe under the watchful eyes of three lions. Not only were the lions guarding her, they allegedly chased off her captors.

The girl was reportedly abducted by the seven men with the idea that she would be forced into marrying one of the them. According to the United Nations, about 70 percent of the marriages taking place in Ethiopia are the result of similar kidnappings. And nearly 100 percent of those abduction-marriages are not thwarted by kindly wildlife.

Read more: Living

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Other countries can’t get enough of U.S. sperm

American Sperm is the FUCKING BEST
Jaakobou
American Sperm is the FUCKING BEST.

So our manufacturing sector is dead and so our economy is growing hardly at all. But you know what? Who cares? Because American jizz rules! Seriously. We're over here trying to reduce population growth, telling everybody about the environmental drawbacks of having too many children, and meanwhile the whole world is just pumping us dry of sperm.

Yes, when people around the globe are looking for high-quality sperm, they come to the U.S. This is not for the reasons the Tea Party might think (i.e. our superior strength, Aryan good looks, and congenitally oversized freedom glands). It's mainly because our disease screening is so good, but our donor screening is so lax -- so we have a really big pool (eew) of well-vetted sperm.

Read more: Living

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Science proves definitively that sea lions can headbang to music

motorhead_sea_lion

Once upon a time there was an adorable little 4-year-old sea lion named Ronan. She was found in on the highway in San Luis Obispo, Calif., and taken to the Pinniped Cognition and Sensory Systems Lab at UC Santa Cruz. A graduate student began training her to bob her head with a metronome. Over time -- with steady rewards of fish -- she began to be able to bob her head to songs that she'd never even heard before.

Not only is she amazing, she is making scientists question previously held beliefs about animals' ability to keep a beat -- she's the first nonhuman mammal to be proven to have a sense of rhythm. The results of this have recently been published in the Journal of Comparative Psychology. If, however, you don't feel like reading some boring article by a bunch of boring people that you probably won't understand anyway, you should just watch this:

Read more: Living

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This jellyfish is also a robot that is also a spy

The Jellyfish Who Came In From The Cold
The Jellyfish Who Came In From The Cold.

Have you ever lain awake at night thinking, "Wow, I would just sleep so much easier if I knew that, in addition to all the  drones that already exist, someone was out there adding to the genre of unmanned war apparatus by inventing a giant robotic jellyfish that could spy on people?"

Well you can rest easy tonight, because indeed, there's a partnership between the U.S. Navy and Virginia Tech College of Engineering intent on creating such a creature/object/robot/jellyfish. In fact, they are so dedicated to this project that they have constructed a 600-gallon tank entirely for the robo-jelly. (We wonder if they are having parties in it like in our favorite scene from Real Genius?)

The "jellyfish" is made out of a metal base, kind of like a really ugly coffee table. It is then covered with a flexible silicone top, and then has all these little wires and stuff so it can move along, really jellyfish-like, so that America's enemies just look at it and say, "Oh, look at that jellyfish!" instead of "Look at that thing that looks like a jellyfish that is spying on us right now." Here is a video of the people making it:

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These elementary school kids fought to keep their local park open — and won

These are the kids at the park they saved
These are the kids at the park they saved.

These awesome elementary school kids saved a California state park from closing, and you can learn their story in a new documentary called (kinda prosaically) How The Kids Saved The Parks.

Back in 2011 and 2012, the state of California, racked by budget cuts and the general fallout from having so many assholes live there who want to enjoy this amazing state without paying the kind of taxes that make such enjoyment possible, made an attempt to close South Yuba River State Park. Some kids at Grass Valley Charter School were not happy about this. So they took action.

Read more: Cities, Living

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Gwyneth’s daughter, the world’s most perfect eater, eats Flamin’ Hot Cheetos and likes it

A definitely real and accurate portrayal of how Gwyneth serves food at home.
Eva / El Hormiguero TV
A definitely real and accurate portrayal of how Gwyneth serves food at home.

While I've always been impressed with Gwyneth Paltrow's dedication to what goes into her body/temple, and it's always made me feel like there's hope for this planet if someone who can afford to eat gold-plated giant panda if she wants to just eats vegetables and eschews red meat, I've never had that "Wow, OK, you're a PERFECT eater" feeling about her I really wanted to have. First of all, she's always like, "Sugar is so terrible for you, unless it's in wine!" And second of all, she's 40. So even if she eats really healthy now, she had her entire life to eat disgusting food, plus Jamie Oliver made her eat a hamburger just a few months ago.

But her daughter, Apple, on the other hand, is only 8, and she is such a perfect eater that toxins just fall right out of her. Apparently she refuses to eat meat, just flat-out refuses, how adorable is that? Her perfection is so awe-inspiring to me that when I do a guided meditation, and I'm asked to go to a place of perfection, I invariably always go right to Apple Martin's intestines.

So imagine my horror to read that Apple not only likes to eat junk food, but that when she does -- when Gwyneth lets her -- she eats frickin' Flamin' Hot Cheetos.

Read more: Food, Living

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This man stole 42,000 pounds of cheese

This is the face of a man who steals cheese
This is the face of a man who steals cheese.

Did you know that cheese is the most stolen of all food products? Up to 4 percent of cheese is stolen at some point during its cheesy life. A lot of that is shoplifting, but some of it is organized cheese crime, like the $200,000 worth of Muenster cheese a man stole recently in Wisconsin. (It WOULD be Wisconsin, wouldn't it.) His plan was to sell the cheese to retailers on the East Coast, a feat which one East Coast cheese retailer said "wouldn't really be that hard." Apparently there's a robust black market for cheese?

Read more: Food