As a Texas oilman and major contributor to the Republican Party, you’ve just launched yourself, at 80, into green stardom by devising an energy plan that relies mainly on wind power.

Green stardom. All you have to do is mention wind turbines to make the eyes of dirty hippies glaze over in delight.

Estimated time for full financial recovery by Exxon Mobil Corp. from yesterday’s Supreme Court decision: 4.5 days.

As written in yesterday’s opinion:

The real problem, it seems, is the stark unpredictability of punitive awards.

The ad is being released in conjunction with a National Center for Public Policy Research policy paper, “Listing the Polar Bear Under the Endangered Species Act Because of Projected Future Global Warming Could Harm Bears and Humans Alike,” by Peyton Knight and Amy Ridenour.

The paper questions the wisdom of listing the polar bear as threatened based on environmentalist organizations’ projections of future global warming because:

• Listing the polar bear could have adverse affects on bear conservation efforts.

Now that we know irony is dead, let’s check parody’s vital signs:

Preferring to keep us all waiting just a little longer, however, last Thursday Bush’s EPA put off any possible whining about regulations until well into the next administration:

… Last year the Supreme Court ruled, contrary to the Bush administration’s wishes, that greenhouse gases were a pollutant that came under the jurisdiction of the EPA. So the EPA’s scientists took a look, and they concluded that, yes, greenhouse gases contributed to global warming and ought to be regulated under the Clean Air Act. The White House, of course, was not happy about this, so on Thursday EPA Administrator Stephen Johnson deep-sixed the scientific findings and opened up a “lengthy public comment period” to give corporate contributors the public a chance to weigh in on this.

To which Rep. Markey (D-Mass.) adds:

This cynical step by EPA to announce an “Advanced Notice of Proposed Rulemaking” in the coming months should be seen for what it is: an “Aspirational Notice of Procrastinational Rulemaking.”

About 22 minutes into the segment, he says the following [my own transcription]:

If we don’t drill more in this country, I am quite concerned about civil disturbances in our urban areas because of the price of fuel.

…

I was meeting in Los Angeles with mayor Villaraigosa and I asked him a specific question because I lived there during the Rodney King civil disturbances. [I] said, “How is the mood in the hood based upon the price of gasoline compared to the mood in the hood at the time of the Rodney King disturbances?” He said it’s threshold.

Let us drill or those people will act all crazy again! You know how they can be when it comes to things like this.

And they say environmentalists are alarmist.

While the area of collapse involves 160 square miles at present, a large part of the 5,000-square-mile Wilkins Ice Shelf is now supported only by a narrow strip of ice between two islands, said CU-Boulder’s Ted Scambos, lead scientist at NSIDC. “If there is a little bit more retreat, this last ‘ice buttress’ could collapse and we’d likely lose about half the total ice shelf area in the next few years.”

Shouldn’t that be “Region of Beachfront Reclamation”? Liberal media bias!

If carbon = life, then Al Gore …

Since it’s Friday, here’s another gem that’s too bad even for the CWI to attempt to air nationally:

No?

Instead, they offer us John Coleman’s Medienkritik:

Coleman told an audience at the 2008 International Conference on Climate Change on March 3 in New York that he is highly critical of global warming alarmism.

“The Weather Channel had great promise, and that’s all gone now because they’ve made every mistake in the book on what they’ve done and how they’ve done it and it’s very sad,” Coleman said. “It’s now for sale and there’s a new owner of The Weather Channel will be announced — several billion dollars having changed hands in the near future. Let’s hope the new owners can recapture the vision and stop reporting the traffic, telling us what to think and start giving us useful weather information.”

John Coleman, providing useful information in a place where the weather can change from a comfortable day at the beach to a comfortable day at the beach in an instant:

Mr. Morano, in an e-mail message, was undaunted, saying turnabout is fair play: “Fair is fair. Noting (not hyping) an unusually harsh global winter is merely pointing out the obvious. Dissenters of a man-made ‘climate crisis’ are using the reality of this record-breaking winter to expose the silly warming alarmism that the news media and some scientists have been ceaselessly promoting for decades.”

And then there’s this: “Earth’s ‘Fever’ Breaks: Global Cooling Currently Under Way.”

That should answer Barry Ritholtz‘s question (h/t to sunsetbeachguy):

If the above long term chart was a stock, would you short it?

Apparently the the Republican minority on the Senate Environment and Public Works Committee would.