Sen. Sheldon Whitehouse (D-R.I.) and Sen. James Inhofe (R.-Okla.) are practically like Batman and Joker around here (I’ll let you decide who is who depending on whether you have a brain or not). Inhofe continued the epic struggle by blocking a resolution that formally acknowledged the reality of climate change and carbon pollution’s role in it. Inhofe says he based his decision on a petition signed by 9,000 American people — though some of the signatures listed belonged to The Spice Girls (not American) and MASH’s Maj. Frank Burns (not a person).

The reflex response would of course be to froth at the mouth and start hitting yourself on the head with a mallet like a cartoon wolf. But instead Whitehouse, with the Zen calm of Lao Tzu, spends a solid seven minutes patiently eviscerating every denier argument ever (including why you should trust the combined intellect of NASA, NOAA, Mars Inc., and Walmart over that of Baby Spice).

But seriously, we all need to stop what we’re doing and memorize it like the Gettysburg Address, that one speech from Braveheart, and the extended edition of Kendrick Lamar’s “Swimming Pools.”

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