This might be the weirdest biking story EVER. Newspaper delivery guy Steven Gove was biking in Manitowoc, Wis., on Saturday night, responsibly wearing a reflective vest, front and back flashers ablaze. Then a 20-year-old in a red two-door smashed into him, propelling Gove into the windshield — where he remained until the driver got home and went inside.

The good news is that Gove is gonna be fine, aside from some cuts and glass that got into his eyes. The bad news is WTF, HUMANITY?! It sounds like the driver was drunk, but that doesn’t really make us feel any better about this:

[Gove] said he turned to the driver and said, “Hello, I’m the guy you hit on the bicycle.” The driver did not respond, but continued on, running a stop sign and hitting another vehicle before he arrived home…

The man finally noticed Gove when he stopped the car outside his home. “He looked at me and said ‘Who are you? What are you doing in the car?’” Gove said. “He started freaking out: ‘I’m going to jail, I’m going to jail.’”

Yeah, that’s what we’re hoping!

Then, instead of maybe helping Gove outta the windshield or getting him medical attention, the driver locked the car and just peaced out. (SERIOUSLY?!) Gove had to crawl into the car, unlock the door, and lurch outside, where the cops found him and took him to the hospital. We’re glad he’s OK, and here’s hoping karma gives the driver a swift kick in the tuchus.

P.S. If you’re a cyclist, check out this handy checklist in case you get hit:

cyclist-hit-checklist
Steven Vance