Pizza Hut knows you like pizza. A lot. Maybe you even love pizza. Pizza Hut knows what we all want from those that we love: commitment. And Pizza Hut’s finally ready to settle down. So, Pizza Hut joined OKCupid. It’s serious: “We’re going to skip the whole dating part and go right to the proposal.”

The Greatest Proposal Ever.

Here’s how we see this going down:

Reader support helps sustain our work. Donate today to keep our climate news free. All donations DOUBLED!

1. First, you’ll send @pizzahut an Instagram video or tweet@pizzahut a Vine tagged #CommitToGreatness by Feb 21st. Tell us your most creative proposal idea. Ninjas? Unicorns? Professional babies? Don’t let reality hold you back. Let your Greatness flag fly. It’ll feel good.

Grist thanks its sponsors. Become one.

2.We’ll contact the three (3) most creative suitors via Twitter or Instagram, and take you on a trip to get to know you better.

3. If we decide you’re The One, we’ll surprise you with the Greatest Proposal Ever. Obviously, that means free pizza for life.

Are you ready to #CommitToGreatness?

But let’s be real here. No one goes on OKCupid looking for real commitment. It’s all about sleeping with the person on the first date. (Or so we hear, hi Mom.) Maybe they actually want Pizza eHarmony?

Grist thanks its sponsors. Become one.

Besides, Pizza Hut’s profile is no more trustworthy than any other profile on that site — like other online daters, Pizza Hut is willing to change its self-presentation drastically in order to give you what it thinks you want. So don’t trust Pizza Hut, ladies and gents. Maybe all you wanted was a simple cheese pizza, and that’s what Pizza Hut promised. But you never know when Pizza Hut’s going to reveal the truth: It can be total mess, with secret hot dogs or cheeseburgers hidden in its crust. Ugh, we’re never dating again.