As the world turns
World continues spinning on its axis.
Americans awoke Wednesday morning surprised to find that the sun still rises, 2 plus 2 still equals 4, and there are still eight planets in the solar system.
“I was shocked,” Seattle Democrat Mary Harris told Grist, “but when I looked out my window this morning, there were actually birds singing!”
Harris also expressed surprise that work was not canceled, her dog still needed walking, and the sky was not a roiling, flaming inferno.
“It’s almost like the world is 13.772 billion years old and will continue to exist despite what happens on planet Earth,” Harris continued. “Who knew?”