coke_60s
Ajax All Purpose Blog

I was already pretty irked when I heard about a study that said women gain weight because they don’t do enough work around the house, but I mostly resolved to ignore it because it is dumb. What I didn’t realize at first, though, is that it was funded by the Coca-Cola company. Suddenly, the frantic flailing for any bullshit, sexist, non-soda-related explanation for U.S. average weight gain makes a lot more sense.

The study looked at a bunch of diaries and found that women averaged 13 hours a week doing housework in 2010, compared to 26 hours in 1965. They also spend more time sitting at computers than they did in 1965, for some mysterious reason. Boom: An explanation for why we as a country tend to weigh more, one that doesn’t have to account for tricky variables like food culture, weight thresholds, health care, potential hormone disruption, the idea that women are capable of doing other active things besides housework, or the existence of men!

Or, crucially, the existence of junk food like Coke. I mean, I hardly think Americans have gotten heavier solely because of soda, or even solely because of the overabundance and convenience of crap food generally. But I’m pretty fucking sure that it’s a lot more likely of an explanation than pinning our national health on that pesky women’s lib.

Obviously, you should try to limit your sedentary time if you are a lady, and maybe even if you are a dude? And you should also probably do more housework, preferably mine. But I’d take it with a grain of salt when Coca-Cola money says, “don’t worry your pretty head about HFCS, ladies; just get back in the kitchen and make me a sandwich. And make yourself a grapefruit half, you’re getting a little porky.”