Remember tar balls? Those were just an appetizer. The scary new oil formations washing up on Louisiana’s beaches sound like you’d get them at Whole Foods — “emulsified oil,” “oil mousse.” Um, yum? This comes right on the heels of the government approving deepwater exploration plans for the first time since last year’s disaster. Sure, I guess we’re ready to start deepwater drilling again! What’s the worst that could happen? Emulsified oil? I’ll put it on my arugula!

If “oil mousse” doesn’t strike you as tasty enough, what about penguin toast? Okay, maybe that is not a real food, but plenty of penguins could be toast in the South Atlantic, where a shipwreck leaking 1,500 tons of heavy crude is threatening half the world’s population of rockhopper penguins.

In the words of Louisiana local politician Billy Nungesser, “this is BULLSH*T.” He didn't say the asterisk, though.

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