Usually, we at Grist List try to make the news amusing for your entertainment. But sometimes Congress does the work for us.

The scene: A committee hearing on drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge.

The characters: Rep. Don Young (R-Alaska), drilling advocate, professional crank
Douglas Brinkley, respected historian
Rep. Doc Hastings (R-Wash.), committee chairman, author of every bit of anti-environmental policy to come out of Congress since 2008

Grist List presents, “Members of Congress Are Jerks, in One Act”*

YOUNG: I will tell you if you ever want to see an exercise in futility, it’s this hearing. That side’s already made up its mind. This side has already made up its mind. And I call it garbage, Dr. Rice, that comes from the mouth …

BRINKLEY: Dr. Brinkley. Rice is a university. I know you went to Yuba College and you couldn’t graduate.

YOUNG: I’ll call you anything I want to call you when you sit in that chair … You just be quiet.

BRINKLEY: You don’t own me. I pay your salary.

YOUNG: I’ll tell you right now …

BRINKLEY: I work for the private sector. You work for …

HASTINGS: Mr. Brinkley, do you want to continue to sit in this panel?

BRINKLEY: Yes.

HASTINGS: OK. Then please follow the rules.

The best part about this is that it goes into the Congressional Record forever.

*This transcript has been lightly edited to spare you congressional um-ing and hm-ing.