This is the part where that guy at the top brings the Ten Commandments down from the mountain.

OK, yes, the word “epic” is sorely overused to mean “something that is awesome on an awesomeness continuum that runs roughly from cornflakes to supernovas.” But when I say that photographer Steve Simonsen’s video of hundreds of thousands of migrating hermit crabs is epic, I mean “would not be out of place in a Cecil B. DeMille film.”

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It’s partly the score, of course, which is sheer “glorious battle” music. But it’s also the inspiring sight of thousands upon thousands of scrappy little crabs, clambering over each other on their way across the beach. It’s especially striking since you normally just see hermit crabs in elementary school classrooms — this is like a battalion of gerbils strapping on gladiator helmets and having a chariot race, or a bag of goldfish trying to walk into Mordor.