The New York Times’ unwarranted attack on my air conditioner

This is my actual air conditioner. Adorable, no?

There was a report in the Times this morning that outlines the various ways in which the coolant gases in air conditioners are bad for the environment. Here’s the key section:

The leading scientists in the field have just calculated that if all the equipment entering the world market uses the newest gases currently employed in air-conditioners, up to 27 percent of all global warming will be attributable to those gases by 2050.

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So the therapy to cure one global environmental disaster is now seeding another. “There is precious little time to do something, to act,” said Stephen O. Andersen, the co-chairman of the treaty’s technical and economic advisory panel.

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For me, sitting in New York City where the temperature is still hot (as I won’t shut up about), this article is basically like The New York Times decided to tell me that my best friend is the world’s biggest jerk. I know that, New York Times. I know my best friend is a jerk. But he is my best friend.

What’s next, New York Times? An expose about how sitting can kill you? Oh, you already covered that. Great.

You know what I read, New York Times? I read that chopping down trees and making paper out of them and slathering them with ink in a futile effort to cling onto a legacy media format that is far past its prime is also bad for the environment! That’s what I read, New York Times!

Deep breath.

I’m sorry. That was uncalled for. Yes, the gasses in air conditioners are bad for the environment. But the gasses in my air conditioner, my one little air conditioner – which is in Energy Saver mode, mind you – aren’t bad. They’re just his gasses! He can’t help it! Don’t pick on him, New York Times (and your affiliated research scientists).

In closing, here are three other important articles about air conditioners.

• How Often Do Air Conditioners Fall Out of NYC Windows and Kill People? (Answer: very rarely! Air conditioners love us and expect reciprocation.)
• Air Conditioning Makes You Weak (Booooo)
• Counterpoint: Air Conditioning Makes You Cool and Strong Like Fonzie (Yaaaayyy)

Here at Gristmill, we cover the news.