Finally, a pizza so horrible it makes us throw up our hands (and breakfasts)
You know what? Fine. Fucking fine. Do whatever you want. Cinnabon pizza? Sure. Pizza with crust made of hot dogs or cheeseburgers? Go nuts. Pizza-encrusted candy bars? Knock yourself out. Because now that I’ve seen Pizza Hut Singapore’s Double Sensation, a pizza so godawfully overdone that it’s actually topped with a cherry, I just cannot with you people and your hell-pizzas anymore.
For some reason that I profoundly hope will never be explained, this pizza is actually shaped like one of those chip plates with a dip bowl in the middle — there’s a walled-in area in the center, like a kind of cheese atrium. From what I’m seeing, it looks like that section has a different sauce and different toppings than the outer pizza, and … oh god … the little wall is stuffed with sausage? Pizza Hut Singapore, what did I ever do to you?
God, why am I even spending time trying to understand this pizza. It’s got lunch meats and zucchini on it. The outside is slashed like a Renaissance doublet so cheese can splurt out. THERE IS A CHERRY ON THE TOP I DID NOT MAKE THAT PART UP. It is honestly futile to try to comprehend it. We must simply accept it and move on.