There’s actually something worse than phosphates, antidepressants, or birth control in the wastewater: your old dildo. We’re not sure why someone flushed an unidentified sex toy down the sewers of Devon, England, but it sure made a mess.
According to the Exeter Express and Echo, a sewage company in southwest England has found some pretty crazy items in the waste system, beyond the usual cotton balls and condoms clogging things up:
Some of the more unusual items that have been found by our network crews include false teeth, mobile phones, plastic toilet freshener hangers, underwear, a 12-inch kitchen knife, and sex toys.
REALLY, people?! Have you not heard of Goodwill?
Other items found down the drains by technicians have included steel rods, children’s toys including bicycles, a dismantled greenhouse, and a dead sheep …
That phrasing implies that children in Devon play with dismantled greenhouses and dead sheep, so maybe it’s not so surprising that they grow up to stick dildos down the loo. And here’s the kicker:
The sex toy found actually caused a major internal flood.
That’s what she said.
But seriously, don’t flush your sex toys. Fish don’t know what to do with them.