sex

Ask Umbra on Babeland’s boinking for bucks

Birds do it. Bees do it. You know what I’m buzzing about. And as long as you’re doing it, why not do it for Grist? For the entire month of April, Babeland will be donating 20 percent of sales of all their eco-friendly sex toys to Grist. You might remember this video about breaking up […]

Ask Umbra on dating, individual actions, and coffee stirrers

Send your question to Umbra! Q. Dear Umbra, I’m a single gal, living in Seattle, where one would think it might be easy to meet a socially and environmentally conscious, yet non-douchey fellow, but it’s actually really difficult to find any suitable guy to go out with. It’s like if I meet a dude who […]

New York City gets big reaction to new sex symbol

When the Big Apple’s health department tried putting out free condoms, it found the recipients were less than stimulated by the wrapper’s appearance. To sex it up, the city held an online contest to design a new package, 15,000 voters got in on the action, and of course, one hot symbol nailed it. The condom […]

Ask Umbra’s pearls of wisdom on Valentine’s Day

Dearest readers, Sometimes when I’m down in the stacks researching answers to your latest dilemmas, I enjoy taking a stroll down Ask Umbra archives lane. Here are some sparkly tidbits I culled from my past advice on lessening your impact on that sweet little romantic holiday, Valentine’s Day. Have any of your own sustainable loving […]

PETA on one side, FOX on the other … now that’s a conundrum

In this corner, we have PETA, a shameless animal-rights organization that uses boobies to make its point at least — what, once or twice a minute? To wit: this latest, uh, holiday-themed ad featuring Polish Playboy model Joanna Krupa. In the other corner, we have FOX News and angry Christians: For a higher purpose?PETA.org “It’s […]

Energy efficiency and sex

I’ve spent a lot of time in the last week strolling around Paris, eating long meals at cafes, stopping in little shops, wandering through cathedrals, sitting on park benches, and generally enjoying the aesthetic pleasures of the world’s most beautiful day-to-day culture. So it was a shock to the system to enter the cavernous Palais […]

Umbra advises on population

Q. Dear Umbra, You once replied to a request for some simple things all environmentally concerned individuals should do by pointing them toward some “Top Ten lists” for eco-minded people. Without a doubt, hands down, the number 1 action that should be followed for anyone concerned with the environment is to limit your procreation to […]

An eco-friendly Valentine’s Day guide for the bitter and alone

If the only thing you’re more tired of than Valentine’s Day is all those tips for how to green your Valentine’s Day, take heart. You can hate on Hallmark and smug couples while still showing your mad hot love for the Earth. Here’s our guide to celebrating Singles Awareness Day in eco-style. 1. Get back […]

Did NBC squash PETA corn-porn?

This bit of "news" may or may not be another brilliant PETA stunt (damn, they're good) -- but supposedly NBC nixed a luscious Super Bowl ad claiming that "vegetarians have better sex." I was going to write another poem, but then I came across PETA's list of NBC's purported editing requests -- pure poetry of its own:

• licking pumpkin
• touching her breast with her hand while eating broccoli
• pumpkin from behind between legs
• rubbing pelvic region with pumpkin
• screwing herself with broccoli (fuzzy)
• asparagus on her lap appearing as if it is ready to be inserted into vagina
• licking eggplant
• rubbing asparagus on breast.

Keats couldn't have said it better. Yeah, go ahead, watch it:

'Veggie Love': PETA's Banned Super Bowl Ad