A car crash in Japan that's being hailed as the most expensive ever, even though it totally wasn't, totaled eight Ferraris, a Lamborghini, and three Mercedes…es. (Ugh, I just looked it up and Mercedes looks like a fifth-declension noun with the nominative plural "Mercedes," so I can't even make up a cutesy Latinate plural, WHATEVER LATIN.) Nobody was seriously injured, so you can feel free to point and laugh a little bit at the 1 percent getting their fancy toys smashified (to the tune of an estimated $3 million, no less).

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Here's where it gets really funny, though: The crash apparently started when one of the Ferraris tried to pass a Prius and hit a guardrail, probably because the Ferraris were driving an estimated 80-100 miles per hour at the time of the crash. Guess what was like the only car NOT totaled? Oh yeah, that's right.

I hope the Prius' owner is airbrushing Michelangelo's David on the side and getting it a custom car bra embroidered with the words "TWELVE AT ONE BLOW."

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