1. A first: Rock musicians refuse Hummers

    All the cool bands, from heavyweights Smashing Pumpkins and Talking Heads to up-and-coming indie darlings Trans Am, The Thermals, and Four Tet, have given the official H2 salute to big-money offers from Hummer to license their music for commercials. Said Thermals singer Hutch Harris, “It’s just so evil.” Word.

    Photo: FUH2.com

  2. It’s like Hansel and Gretel, but gross

    Now when you poop in the woods you can leave seeds behind! No, we’re not talking about adding sunflower seeds to your trail mix. We speak of “enviro-roll,” the toilet paper with “indigenous, endemic, and non-invasive” seeds embedded — though hopefully not in your fanny.

  3. Any herbal Botox in there?

    At the Academy Awards this weekend, a panoply of fabulous celebs will participate in the “Red Carpet Green Cars” campaign, arriving in hybrids and receiving Oscar SWAGG (Sustainability, Wellness, and Green Gifts) bags filled with goodies. The message: reduce consumption. Ha ha ha! No, the message is … uh …

    Image:78th Academy Awards®

  4. Guess the truth isn’t the only thing out there …

    Fox Mulder and wife Tea Leoni cited possible “ecological and geographical damage” in their battle against a proposed apartment block that would tower over their Malibu mansion. But rumor has it the real concern was privacy: Apparently, Mulder loves to swim and shower naked in the backyard. Foxy!

  5. Watch for upcoming Grist employee calendar

    Our very own One True Exalted Leader was in L.A. this past week for a fashion shoot with famed photog Mark Seliger. His ruggedly handsome mug will appear in the upcoming “green” issue of Vanity Fair. Apparently he was worried about stubble, but for our part, we’re just glad he lost the college-era glasses. And, um, hair.