gorilla_copulation
Photo: Mongabay.com

Always a day late and a dollar short, I present to you, ah, two more love stories from nature. The first from Mongabay, which includes a hot photo of two mountain gorillas in the dorso-ventral (missionary) position. A true feminist of the gorilla world, this female has also pioneered the use of tools to measure the depth of puddles before walking into them. Given enough evolutionary time and no competition from upright walking primates, her progeny would probably discover fire and eventually use it to burn their bras.

You might want to take a cold shower before reading this next one from The New York Times, which is quite explicit.

What weighs less than two pounds and has a gnarly 11-inch-long Johnson?

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Correct! The blue billed duck. To put this into perspective, a linear extrapolation by weight would give the T-Rex a penis over 13,000 feet long, thus demonstrating the limits of linear extrapolations, and why we have to get going on this global warming problem, because it ain’t linear either. Hat tip to Caniscandida.