1. We particularly look forward to the melons appetizer

    Everyone from brawny Texas firefighters to glitzy Hollywood celebs is going veggie, which just goes to show tofu’s power to bring not only indigestion, but peace to the world. Maybe the fellows from Engine 2 should stop by the latest chichi bistro and eat from Pam’s menu. If you know what we mean.

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    Photo: Jeff Vespa/WireImage.com
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  2. Forever and ever, ramen

    In a recent speech, George W. Bush said the “fundamental debate” about global warming is: “is it man-made or natural?” Heretic! All true Pastafarians have studied the just-released Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster and know that global warming is caused by the declining number of pirates. Repent, George!

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  3. Geek oil

    Open-source geeks and peak-oil geeks: a match made in … oh, the deepest circle of pocket-protector hell. Their interests unite with a new plug-in for the Firefox browser that automatically converts all dollar amounts on the web to barrels of oil. For instance, Crichton’s State of Fear can be had for .44 barrels. How much is that in BS?

    Image derived from powells.com

  4. Green on crime

    “We want to become the first ecological prison in the world,” says the governor of the minimum-security joint on Norway’s Bastoy Island. Inmates work alongside guards maintaining the island greenery and also enjoy beach access and skiing privileges. Who you gotta kill to get a reservation?

    Photo: iStockphoto.

  5. Brarchitecture … hm, doesn’t really work …

    In June, PBS will begin airing “design: e2,” a six-part series on green architecture. Of course if it were just educational, Grist List would have nothing to do with it. But it’s narrated by Brad Pitt, yo! Maybe he’ll illustrate energy efficiency by stacking all 12 of his adopted kids in one room.

    Photo: Jon Furniss/WireImage.com