The New York subway and your legs: a combination you probably never thought of, but now that it’s been done it seems so obvious. For starters, think how useful these would be on dates. “Buddy, if I see your hand north of Gramercy I am outta here.”

These tights, made by Nylon Journal, come in black or white, but not in any other lines besides the 4/5, presumably because they’re the wrong shape. Which is too bad — they should have made tights of the G line, because they’d never run. (Joke courtesy of Philip Bump, who will be here all week, folks. Tip your server.)