A couple of weeks ago, a bunch of oil appeared on the surface of the Gulf of Mexico. BP was all, “Hm? What’s this about oil?” Then the government said, yeah, it’s from the Deepwater Horizon spill. And BP was all, “Hm? Oh, that? Yeah, I guess.” And the government suggested that maybe BP try and figure out what’s happening? Maybe make sure the broken well isn’t leaking again? And BP sighed heavily and whined about how none of its friends had to do chores and how it had all this homework and blah blah blah so the Coast Guard decided to just check for itself. BP, pleased, put its headphones back on and mumbled under its breath about what dicks these government dudes are.

Anyway, the Coast Guard figured out the source of the leak.

An undersea camera confirms that an oil slick discovered in the Gulf of Mexico came from a 100-ton device on the seafloor that BP had used several weeks after the 2010 oil spill in a failed attempt to cap its runaway Macondo well, the U.S. Coast Guard said Thursday.

The oil is not coming from the Macondo itself, which was sealed in a relief well operation months after the 2010 blowout.

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Less than 100 gallons of oil per day is leaking from the containment device, the Coast Guard said. The oil will continue to dribble out slowly for the time being. Officials are trying to figure out the best course forward. …

“The latest survey marks the third time since the Macondo well was permanently sealed in September 2010 that it has been visually inspected at the seafloor and confirmed not to be leaking,” BP said in a statement.

I’m kind of amused by the idea of some BP dudes floating around above the broken well when it was still spitting out oil, then plunking down a giant cover on it that didn’t work. Then just sitting on that boat, scratching their chins and saying, “hmmm” to each other, dropping litter all over the place.

So lame that the government wants BP to clean up this mess.

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Rep. Ed Markey, another government hard-ass, thinks maybe BP should actually fix the problem.

U.S. Rep. Edward Markey of Massachusetts, a top Democrat on the House Committee on Natural Resources, said BP should immediately release “so that the American people and the scientific community can see for themselves that no oil is leaking from the well itself.”

“In addition, BP should seek to recover all oil trapped inside the failed containment dome or any other debris that remains on the seafloor in order to prevent even more oil from spilling into the environment,” Markey said.

To which BP rolled its eyes.

This is my favorite part of the article.

BP said the Coast Guard has determined the sheen is not feasible to recover and does not pose a risk to the shoreline, but the Coast Guard said it is still considering what should be done.

Ugh. Come on, Coast Guard. Why can’t you just be cool?