1. Meat-free market

    Tired of cracks about the size of their sausage, some vegans have decided to have sex only with each other. Vegansexuals “taste a lot better,” says one — and in their world, soys doesn’t matter.

    Photo: iStockphoto

    Grist thanks its sponsors. Become one.

  2. Ears to you

    Nu metal band Korn have cobbled together plans for a green tour, complete with a nu blend of biofuel they’re calling Korntastic. Sounds kinda korny to us.

    Photo: Theo Wargo / WireImage.com

    Grist thanks its sponsors. Become one.

  3. Scouts’ honors

    Today’s scouts still want to be prepared, just not for the same things their parents faced. Reducing their carbon footprint is a top concern — as is managing money, having safe sex, and building IKEA furniture. What, no patch for mastering Guitar Hero?

    Photo courtesy Girlguiding UK

  4. Hee hee, you said peepee

    The challenge: run a green gallery for the summer that shows Bay Area residents how to be sustainable at home. The solution: PeePeePonics. Why didn’t wee think of that?

    Photo: iStockphoto

  5. Bill Nye, the competitive guy

    Seems the “Science Guy” is now the competitive guy: Nye has challenged his new neighbor, bike-riding-toaster-powering actor Ed Begley Jr., to an eco-duel, saying he wants to “crush him like a bug.” Someone’s got his bow-tie in a bunch.

    Photo: Jeffrey Mayer / WireImage.com