Cockroaches have distinct personalities, according to a new study published in Proceedings of the Royal Society B. Before you break out the Meyers Briggs test and a warm plate of garbage, here’s how one of the scientists described cockroach personalities to the Guardian: “We call them ‘shy or cautious’ and ‘bold or explorers.'”

Wow! What an age we live in! But what’s the reason for this veritable rainbow of cockroach personalities? Here’s how the Guardian put it:

Different personalities are thought to help the survival of the species because by driving different behaviour it increases the chances of at least some surviving when disaster strikes.

Humans will need to respond and adapt to disasters in a changing climate. It seems we could really learn a lot from these little guys. So are you a hardy trash explorer or a shy rubbish sneaker? Take our quiz to find out!

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You’re at a party with your significant other. One drink leads to another and suddenly your SO is loudly telling that terribly embarrassing story from your recent beach vacation. Do you:

A. Garbage! Where is the garbage. Over by foot? Garbage! Foot moves quickly. Run at foot. Garbage? Foot. Food.

B. Staying under this couch for now, thanks. Antennaes crossed foot kicks garbage under couch.

You’ve worked hard and now you’re up for a big promotion at work. Your boss calls you into his office and says that the new guy is getting the gig instead. How do you react?

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A. Hot pile o’ noodles! Ouch! Yum! Slowly fading. OUCH … ouch … YUM

B. Close call. Is hand gone? Going to sit this one out in the spice cabinet.

You’re out at brunch with a married friend and go to the bathroom to wash your hands. You head back to the table and observe your friend flirting and giving his number to your server. Oh dear. What ever shall you do? 

A. Hello, ceiling, my old friend. Oh, hello, hair. You look interesting and comfortable.  Don’t mind if I do.

B. BRIGHT LIGHT!!!! HISS. OH GOD. Get me OUT OF HERE, spiney legs. Is the light still there? Oh god, the light is still there.


MOSTLY A’S: Congratulations, you are a bold or explorer cockroach. You know that you only have one life to live, and you certainly are living it! When disaster strikes, you will be on the front lines helping your fellow humans out and looking for month-old lasagna.

MOSTLY B’S: Sorry, shy or cautious cockroach, I didn’t mean to startle ya! You might not be the life of the party, but your friends love how thoughtful and observant you are. When the planet goes up in flames, you will be prepared and hiding under the rim of a toilet bowl.

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