Once again, it turns out plastic toys from China are more than just an eyesore — they’re a hazard. A toy recall of 86 Fisher Price products, including several branded toddler favorites like the Dora and Elmo, was issued yesterday because of a lead-paint hazard. After scrolling the list, I decided my kids were safe — for now. At least I think so.

My kids have a ton of toys, mostly bought by well-meaning relatives, and I hate almost all of them. They’re ugly. They’re noisy. And now we can add dangerous to the list. Great. I recently started thinking about buying more eco-friendly toys. But geesh, are those things expensive. I’m wondering if my girls will be happy with one doll for Christmas.

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Maybe fewer toys wouldn’t be such a bad thing. If only I could convince my mom of this. And the rest of America.

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