A brilliant blogger has assembled a list of food and frugality tips gathered from Dwight K. Shrute, assistant to the regional manager at The Office‘s Dunder Mifflin paper company.

Dwight K. Shrute

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Below, a few gems:

DWIGHT SAYS: “My grandfather left me a 60-acre working beet farm. I run it with my cousin Mose. We sell beets to the local stores and restaurants. It’s a nice little farm … sometimes teenagers use it for sex.”
DWIGHT MEANS: Buy local.
Not only does it support neighborhood farmers (who need security to keep randy kids away), but food that’s shipped from nearby tastes better, is better for you, and is easier on the environment.

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DWIGHT SAYS: “Studies show that more information is passed through watercooler gossip than through official memos, which puts me at a disadvantage because I bring my own water to work.”
DWIGHT MEANS: Bottled water is a big, wet gyp.
Packing a thermos from home, using the cooler at the office, or simply gathering H2O from the tap can conserve up to $600 per year, depending on how often you buy bottled.