The Philadelphia Zoo is really playing with fire these days. The zoo’s resident black-footed cats, Ascari and Aza, gave birth to three kittens on April 8. Because the zoo employees enjoy goading the Old Gods and the New, they named the kittens Drogon, Rhaegal, and Viserion.
“Wow, those names are pretty goofy!” you may be thinking. O, blissful ignorance! They’re taken from Game of Thrones, and are the names of Daenerys Targaryen’s three pet dragons.
Here are a few reasons one may find it appropriate to name a cuddly, sweet kitten after an extremely destructive mythical creature:
1) The kittens were hatched from ancient eggs in an enormous bonfire. (Link NSFW.) If that is the case: Philadelphia Zoo, you are really failing to capitalize on a pretty incredible biological phenomenon.
2) The kittens can breathe fire. (Again, missing out on some money-making opportunities.) Possible motives for keeping this fact under wraps: The zoo is planning on using the kittens as a superweapon to destroy MetLife Stadium á la Harrenhal. Look out, Eli Manning!
3) There is no other reason. But you should probably turn off HBOGo and take a walk, or something.
In case you were wondering, a black-footed cat is not just a cat whose feet got extra-dirty from pounding the streets of Filthadelphia. It’s the smallest of the African wild cats and a vulnerable species, originating from the southernmost region of the continent. The black-footed cat’s homeland has an arid climate, so it might come as a bit of a shock to these kitties when parts of Philadelphia are underwater in the next century. Don’t worry, though — according to projections from Climate Central, the Philadelphia Zoo is safe from up to a 10-foot increase in sea levels. Also, there is no way those cats will be alive in 100 years. Sorry!