One area is proving to be fairly immune to the green wave: convenience store robberies. (The Mob, on the other hand, finds green to be a breeze.) Flush with excrement excitement at the prospect of loads o’ moolah, 29 year-old Josh Nelson of Lincoln, Neb., left his reusable ski mask at home and improvised with the disposable: toilet paper.

Nelson must have found it more convenient to wrap toilet paper around his face, than, say, find an actual mask. At least he didn’t go for the panty-hose-over-the-face option: nylon is energy-intensive and non-biodegradable.

It’s not yet clear if police, upon tracking him down after he left a prescription bottle near the scene, proceeded to give the “TP bandit” a swirlie. As punishment, should he be allotted only one square of toilet paper at a time during his stint in the slammer?

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