It’s Earth Day time once again, and we are delighted to present the Third-Ever List of Grist Superlatives — our take on the good, the bad, and the weird of the past year. Think we missed something? Add your cleverest contributions in comments below. (And check out our lists for 2007 and 2006.)
Our sweet Kathleen.
Photo: ks.gov
Year’s biggest loser: coal
Staunchest anti-coal advocate who does something about it: Kansas Gov. Kathleen Sebelius
Hottest new energy technology you never hear about: solar thermal
Try saying that three times fast.
Photo: state.gov
Most transparent attempt to derail momentum toward climate action under the guise of advancing it: Bush’s Major Economies meetings
Second most transparent attempt: This month’s “major speech” on climate
Most unintentionally revealing attempt at reassurance from Bush: “We’re doing a lot to protect this environment.”
Blue is the new green is the new black.
Most unsettling green-is-the-new-black trend: Blue is the new green
Most legitimate trend in danger of facing media-inspired backlash: green building
Most overused and under-elaborated term of the presidential campaign: green-collar jobs
Most overlooked issue of the 2008 campaign: urban sustainability
Perennialest non-candidate of the 2008 campaign: Al Gore
Best way to piss off Grist readers: Raise their hopes that Gore’s running
Adorablest car we can’t quite bring ourselves to buy: Smart ForTwo
Adorablest misread of the name “ForTwo” by a Grist staffer: “fort-wo”
Uncatchiest names for eco-cars: Flextreme, Provoq, EcoBoost
Startlingest appearance of a hybrid vehicle on national TV: The “not yet available” Cadillac Escalade awarded to Super Bowl MVP Eli Manning
Biofuel source we still can’t get our heads around: human fat
They tried to make him go to reg-hab, Stephen said no, no, no.
Photo: epa.gov
Most audacious prioritization of political hackery over expert counsel: EPA chief Stephen Johnson’s denial of California’s air pollution waiver
Second most audacious: Johnson’s open defiance of the Supreme Court’s ruling that EPA must regulate CO2
Third most audacious: Johnson’s refusal to turn over documents related to the ruling to the House Climate Change Committee
Bush apparatchik most likely to be deposed: Stephen Johnson
Best use of flotation device to protect baby seals: Pamela Anderson
Most doggedly eco primetime show: Boston Legal
Least doggedly eco primetime shows (but points for trying): NBC’s Green Is Universal lineup
We’d give up meat for her — and oxygen, too.
Photo: tecasan.com
Awkwardest adolescence: Knut!
Tolerablest vegan spokesperson: Natalie Portman
Best organic Scotch we tried this year: Benromach
OK, only organic Scotch we tried this year: Benromach (send more!)
Spendiest lobbyist attempting to weaken climate legislation: ABEC ACCCE
Favoritest sponsor of presidential debates: ABEC ACCCE
Creepiest commercial from ABEC ACCCE:
Climate policy player most like Baltar — if, you know, policy players were like BSG characters: U.S. CAP
Best climate-related stickin’ it to the man speech: Papua New Guinea delegate at Bali talks
Van with a plan.
Photo: Green for All
Most ubiquitous eco-hottie with a serious message: Van Jones
Endangeredest species not listed under the ESA: polar bear
Greenest politician who, uh, went down this year: Eliot Spitzer
Worst Live Earth-inspired theme song: “Hey You,” by Madonna
Punniest group to hop on corn-fueled-tour bandwagon: Korn
Most comfortable-sounding undergarment made of wood: By Nature briefs
Least comfortable-sounding undergarment made of wood: chopstick bras
Most innuendo-licious wind-powered venture: Heidi Fleiss’ Stud Farm
Most lovable alt-energy spokesdude: Wind
Nothing comes between me and my carbon.
Questionablest use of U.N. funds: Laundry PSAs (don’t iron those jeans!)
Most organizing for least impact: Earth Hour
Least organizing for most impact: “ecoterrorists”
Worst time for John McCain to skip a vote in the Senate: 59-40 vote against the energy bill in Dec. ’07
Second worst: 59-40 vote against the energy bill in Feb. ’08
Climate proposal that ought to pass but won’t: carbon tax
Climate proposal that ought to pass and just might: cap and trade
Dirty, rotten scoundrel.
Year’s biggest, fattest loser (did we mention?): coal
