1. Eat your hat

    Tried to go whole hog, but still have leftovers? Haberdash over to this site to save your bacon. Because “one always looks neat, in a hat made from meat.”

  2. Crop of the Kreme

    Put a spring in your step with these grass-lined flip-flops, created by Krispy Kreme to give stressed-out workers a walk in the park. They’ll grow on you — just donut forget to water them!

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  3. Death is like a box of chocolates

    Pushin’ up daisies? Sleeping with the fishes? Stone-cold dead? Burning in hell? These eco-coffins have you covered.

  4. Off road

    One down … millions to go.

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  5. Tree “hugging”

    We knew rubbing sticks together could create sparks … but we didn’t realize it could create an NSFW video about coming together — for forests, natch. Hey, we know a Norwegian couple who might be willing to help …