I hate to tell you that you can’t go home tonight, because your boyfriend has just been validated in every single grocery trip argument you’ve ever had (“Brad! It’s worth it for the farmers!”): Whole Foods really is too goddamn spendy, and falsely so!

A sting operation conducted by the New York City Department of Consumer Affairs checked out the pricing of pre-packaged products at eight Whole Foods locations, and found that “every label was inaccurate, with many overcharging consumers” according to the New York Daily News. Let us now reflect on the state of crime in New York: Authorities are now running sting operations … at Whole Foods.

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More from the New York Daily News:

[T]he notoriously pricy chain was the most egregious offender — leading DCA to open a full-blown investigation of its pricing practices last year, said Commissioner Julie Menin.

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“Our inspectors told me it was the worst case of overcharges that they’ve ever seen,” Menin said.

The overcharges ranged from 80 cents for a package of pecan panko to $14.84 for a container of coconut shrimp, [agency spokeswoman Abby] Lootens said.

First of all: If you’re buying coconut shrimp at Whole Foods, or pecan panko at all, that’s on you! Make coconut shrimp yourself — it is basically impossible to fuck up, because fried shrimp is never going to taste bad.

To review, you have walked away with three new pieces of knowledge: Whole Foods is full of liars (at least in New York); coconut shrimp is very easy to make; and grocery trips are never, ever worth fighting over, because one day you will be proven indisputably wrong.

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