J. Zimmerman

Man, we have never wished so much that we were commodity dairy cows. Because for a brief second, Ryan Gosling has turned his attention to their plight. And while we wouldn’t want to live in the conditions that these cows live in — or have our horns painfully burned or gouged off our heads — we would not object to having Ryan Gosling pay attention to us. Ryan! Call me!

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The beefed-up star wrote a letter to the National Milk Producers Federation asking them to end the practice of dehorning cows. (OK, probably PETA wrote the letter and someone signed Ryan Gosling’s name with an auto-pen.) Instead, he’d like them to raise cows that don’t have horns to begin with.

We’d do basically anything Ryan Gosling asked us to, so we are a little bit surprised this whole dehorning thing hasn’t ended immediately.

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