Some very swag Colorado lawmakers, including a self-designated “redneck Republican,” can now be found decorating themselves with contraceptives. This is not, for the record, because IUDs are so plentiful in Colorado that there aren’t enough cervixes to hold them (sorry) — on the contrary. An initiative that allows Colorado women to get long-acting reversible contraceptives such as IUDs at minimal cost will lose its private funding in June, and a proposed bipartisan bill would provide that initiative with $5 million to keep operating.

However, because some people out there just really hate the idea of women controlling their own uteri and also have zero concept of how baby-making works, certain moron legislators are trying to block that bill. For example: Kevin Lundberg (R), chair of Colorado’s Senate Health Committee (!!), believes that an IUD is an abortive technique, and as such should not receive any public funding.

Sorry, Kev, but the way in which a medical device functions is not a matter of personal belief. Having an IUD does not mean that your uterus is aborting fetuses willy-nilly: An IUD protects your uterus from hosting any unintended union of an egg and a sperm.  And guess what that means: Fewer abortions! The abortion rate in the United States is the lowest it’s been since 1973. According to the Guttmacher Institute, that has nothing to do with states imposing restrictive abortion laws and everything to do with increased access to effective forms of contraception.

To review: More IUDs = fewer unintended pregnancies = lower abortion rate. Literally everyone wins!

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Akron-based gynecologist-cum-jewelry designer Virginia Smith very correctly realized that IUDs are hot right now, and created a line of IUD-inspired earrings and pins that she sells on Etsy — which now serve as statement pieces for the Colorado legislators in favor of the proposed bill. I’m a big and vocal fan of the IUD and an even bigger and louder fan of the right of women to control their reproductive health, so I made my own (admittedly uglier) IUD jewelry for you. Watch my very comprehensive tutorial above!