This … thingy fell out of the sky over Namibia last month. It's 3.6 feet around, weighs 13 pounds, is hollow, has no markings, and … came out of space? Talk about your extreme weather.

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Is it space junk? Military equipment? A decades-late Spaceballs promo? (Spaceballs the lunchbox! Spaceballs the breakfast cereal! Spaceballs the mysterious metal object from the ionosphere!) Whatever it is, it's not alien; the best part about this story is that officials are going out of their way to say that the substance it's made of (a "sophisticated" metal alloy) is "known to man." Beyond that, who the hell knows. Actually, wait, no, the best part is officials saying that "such reports of metallic spheres falling from space are common in the Southern Hemisphere." You WHAT? Is this something we should have heard about?

Explosions were apparently heard in the area at the time, but there's no evidence of an explosion where the sphere was found. No international space agencies have claimed ownership. Also, I'm just saying, there are only so many elements in the universe; aliens might well have alloys that are "known to man." (Also, a little more soberly: sometimes things are tossed way up in the air in explosions, and they come down elsewhere.)