1. Crappy feet

    Violence! Homosexuality! Anti-Christianity! Environmentalism! Beware the dangerous propaganda lurking in the “darkest, most disturbing feature-length animated film ever offered by a major studio.” (That, friends, is what we like to call a tap smear.)

    Photo: © Warner Bros. Pictures

  2. Bear ass

    Endangered giant pandas of the female persuasion are ready to mate for as few as 48 hours a year, leaving inexperienced man-das with quite a pickle. Enter: panda porn. Bear-chicka-bow-wow!

    Photo: iStockphoto

  3. Join the Mile-Highers

    This ad campaign reminds those who use the john in Denver to flush only what they need. And it doubles as an anti-obesity campaign! Thanks, benches.

    Photo: Sukle Advertising & Design

  4. Crowning around

    The newly sashed Miss Earth 2006, formerly Miss Chile, was chosen for her itsy-bitsy teeny-weeny bikini concern about major environmental issues like global warming. Not surprisingly, Miss United States didn’t make it past the semifinals.

    Photo: iStockphoto

  5. Taking a dump

    Aspenites have set up a “freecycle zone” at the local landfill where the well-to-doers can leave their castoffs for the not-quite-as-well-to-doers. Recent finds include skis and snowboards, hot tubs, patio furniture, and Britney’s panties.

    Photo: iStockphoto