Two-thirds of our waste doesn’t get recycled or composted. Youth activism nonprofit Global Citizen wants to see if you can get that down to zero on Wednesday, which it’s christened #ADayWithoutWaste.

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Can you go one day without creating any garbage — or at least using a travel mug instead of a paper coffee cup? How about a reusable shopping bag instead of a plastic one? (Say it with us now: “No straw in my maw!”)

Because if not, no pressure, but your relationship is totally doomed. Case in point: This guy trying to celebrate the most important of anniversaries — SEVEN MONTHS! — and being totally foiled by that old supervillain, trash:

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The message there is clearly “Ordering takeout will not get you laid.” (It will if the alternative is my Salmonella Surprise. ZING!)

On Global Citizen’s site, you can commit to forgoing things like to-go containers, straws, and disposable bags. Each category gets you points you can redeem for tickets to concerts. So on Wednesday, you can TALK trash all you want (that’ll be great for your relationship!). Just don’t create any.