Surprise! That was a trick. The Republican presidential candidates didn’t say anything about climate change at Thursday night’s debate.

The closest moment came when Ohio Gov. John Kasich, who is apparently still running, mentioned America’s need for energy independence. And how does Kasich suggest we achieve this energy independence? Investment in solar and wind, perhaps? Energy efficiency, maybe? Training gerbils to run on a massive wheel? Nope! Kasich thinks the answer is fracking. That’s right — fracking, the earthquake-making, water-pollutingcancer-causing, testes-enlarging natural-gas extraction process that releases more methane into the atmosphere than a herd of gassy cows. Back to the drawing board, Kasich.

Reader support helps sustain our work. Donate today to keep our climate news free. All donations DOUBLED!

As for the rest of the debate, just imagine Punch and Judy with flag pins and you’ve pretty much got it.

Grist thanks its sponsors. Become one.